You’ve got some holes in your life. I know you do.
In your heart, in your pocket, in your home.
We all do. I’ve got a few. They are scary and we don’t like them at all, so we avoid them or pretend they are not there or blame them on someone else. I’m just thinking out loud here because I really don’t know shit about anything, but stick with me here..
Why not work on filling the holes back in? Like using earth, or dirt, or soil, or whatever stupid, metaphorical garden term you prefer, back into it instead of just putting a wood plank over it, or one of those hideous plastic orange fences around it. Slowly, over time, someone is going to walk or fall through it. You or him, or her, or the kids, or some other innocent bystander.
It’s your stupid hole. Stop leaving it there for everyone else to deal with. Put the work in. Build it back up. Do not go around. Do not turn and walk away. Because you will keep coming back to this same ditch, every fucking time, with new people, with new damage.
That’s the first step.
Stop and take a good look at that fucking hole. Why is it there? What tools do you need to begin fixing it? Maybe come back to it next week with a lawn chair and a six pack (or maybe some soda if your hole is binge drinking) and sit and look at it a little longer. Where can I find the shit I need for this stupid, ugly hole? Is there someone I need to help me with it? How long will this take? Do I have time? Where do I start?
And honestly, I think the best thing to do is: just start.
That’s right, first you stop, then you start.
Take an educated guess or just aimlessly start poking at shit. The movement alone will stir some dirt up, loosen the walls. You can figure it out as you go. But just start.
Stop looking away.
Stop being a pussy. Sorry to all the people against using the word pussy to describe a weak ass person, but honestly it fits and this is my blog and I have one so I can say it and use it however I damn well please!
Stop making other people walk through or tip-toe around this hole, or carry your burden with you or for you. Carry it yourself and start shoveling that fucker in. Until one day you walk past it and it’s finally filled in and the grass has grown over, probably all jacked up, but whatever, and it’s just another piece of life that you don’t even really notice anymore. Something you were brave or lucky enough to walk through and take care of and smooth out – not just for others, but for you too, dummy. It’s about you. Stop living a life you don’t even like. Why are you doing that? Uh. We are so stupid, and lazy, and selfish, and terrified.
Everyone’s got em. Including me.
And I don’t even care what holes are in your yard, baby.
I love people who have them! As long as you’re working on them. Like, really working on them. Not just talking about how much you hate them and how they are ruining your life, or what strategic steps everyone else has to take to avoid falling in them. I don’t even mind helping you fill them in, but you will reach for the shovel first and you will do most of the work, motherfucker.
I feel like this holes bit is running dry.
And, I also just keep thinking about a young Shia LeBeouf.
Just deal with your shit, people!